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avatar dustaknuckz 17 day.ago

I found myself often thinking about commissioning a painting of my.previous wives together, both deep in thought...

I Eventually decided it wasn't worth it... After all, was just Two Ex, Pensive

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. I’ve had some difficult challenges in my day, but nothing really managed to defeat me until the day I tried giving away my pet parrot, even though I was in a large crowd.

I mean, the people at that Lynyrd Skynyrd concert got really excited when I yelled out “free bird!”, but for some reason they weren’t interested in my parrot.

2. Too bad

Me: "I met this gorgeous woman while on vacation in the Islands." Friend: "Nice, where is she from?" Me: "One of those islands down there. Can never remember the name. Starts with a J" Friend: "Jamaica?" Me: "Nah. She wouldn't put out"

3. "Why do female stand-up comics do so many jokes about vaginas?

**Because it’s their tightest material.**

4. After a night of drinking two men decided to stop at the local brothel on the way home...

After giving them a look over the madam pulls the girls aside and says "Put them each in a room with a blow up doll, they're that drunk they won't notice." After they were done and walking back home one of the men turns to the other and says "I think mine was dead" "Dead?" the second replied. "Yeah, she was cold and didn't move or make a sound" The second man then goes "Well I think mine was a witch" "What? Why?" The first man replied "Yeah a witch. When i bit her ass she farted in my face and flew out the window."

5. What's a stalkers favourite room?

The ICU

6. If bedbugs live on our beds and headlice live on our heads

Then tell me why - girls fear cockroaches more than guys?

7. I quit my job because my boss asked me to go to an auction for him.

Call it foolish pride, but I refuse to do anyone else's bidding.

8. What is Yoda’s last name?

Layheewhooo

9. Why was Cinderella so bad at playing basketball?

Well, her coach was a pumpkin..

10. Of all choices for something to hold your beer, which would be the smartest?

Ein Stein

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